The Parenting Tip I Can't Stop Thinking About
Comedy writer Bess Kalb shares six books on her nightstand and the men's sweater we should all wear this fall.
Hi!!!! How is your week going? Hope you’re enjoying these early fall days.
Last night, I met my friends Liv and Ryan (of cute glasses fame) for dinner at Pilot, a boat in Brooklyn that doubles as an oyster bar. Isn’t that cool? We had lobster rolls and fries, and the boat rocked so much at one point that we had to grab our glasses to keep them from flying off the table.
This month, we’ll be celebrating the one-year anniversary of Big Salad with a live virtual event (if you want to chat together!) and a big giveaway we’re excited to share. Plus, a fun personal update ;) ;) ;) More on all that soon.
And, regarding today’s issue, I was lucky enough to meet humor writer
at a dinner party last spring. We were seated by each other, and she cracked me up the whole time. She’s now in my phone as “Bess Funny Radiant Kalb,” and I’m so excited to feature her here…
Emmy Award-nominated TV writer
is the comedic genius behind newsletter, a touching memoir about her grandmother, and the children’s picture book, Buffalo Fluffalo.Her writing always makes us laugh — especially her passive-aggressive emails with her toddler and baby. “You’ve got a hard out at 6:30 p.m. for bath,” she wrote to her two-year-old, and, to baby, “I know you’re set on climbing out of the crib, and everyone is obsessed with that, but how do you feel about trying a version where you stay IN the crib?”
On the phone, I asked Bess for her advice on humor writing. “Have something very upsetting happen to you,” she told me. “Then, instead of processing it, deflect with jokes. If your survival mechanism is humor, you’re at a huge advantage.”
On that note, her most popular Grudge Report newsletter issue was called Some Recipes to Make When You Lose Your Bodily Autonomy, which she wrote in 2022 when Roe v. Wade was overturned. “It felt therapeutic to write it,” she told me. “And the overwhelming reaction to the piece made me feel surrounded by comrades.”
Here, we chat with Bess about social anxiety, a lipstick trick, and 10 favorite things…
TV show: I can’t wait for Bad Sisters Season 2 (November 13th). I’m on a group chat with three comedy writers, where we tried to solve the case last season (I was wrong, one was right). We DMed Sharon Horgan a few screenshots of our chat, and her reply thanking us was the single most validating part of my year, including weaning my two-year-old from breastfeeding. Bad Sisters is a great work — it’s funny, it mines the lowest depths of human suffering, and crucially, every character on the show feels like a real human.
Dresses: As a Brooklyn mom — with, as my Jewish grandmother said, nice birthing hips — I love Ilana Kohn. She’s the gateway drug to Eileen Fisher. (I’m like three years away from Eileen Fisher. When I finally walk in there, they’ll be like, hello, we’ve been waiting for you.) I especially love Ilana’s collaboration with Block Shop, a textile studio founded by the Stockman sisters, who were the coolest girls at my college and remain the coolest girls.
Sweater: You can’t do better than a men’s L.L. Bean cotton fisherman sweater — they’re really cozy and you can toss them in the wash. I take these sweaters from my husband and deny knowing what happened to them.
Blush: I read one scary article about talc and threw out almost everything I own. I swear by the non-toxic Olio e Osso stick in a watermelon-y pink shade. I genuinely use it as an eye-to-cheek-to-lip balm — which is the correct order, by the way. Going lip to cheek to eye is how you end up in urgent care.
