Roxane Gay's 11 Favorite Things
"Hell is other people on airplanes — except for crying children, who are just expressing their feelings and that‘s healthy."
Hello! How is your week going? We are thrilled to feature one of our favorite writers,
. She’s been a major inspiration to us — and maybe you? — for so long. She’s the author of many books, including her fantastic memoir, Hunger; and she writes a smart, funny newsletter called The Audacity.But besides being a brilliant, incisive thinker, Roxane is also just fun. Her biggest hobby, for example, is cake decorating. “The cookbook Icing on the Cake has a recipe for a milk and cookies cake. It’s in the children’s chapter, which cracks me up, because I’m like, No, I'm totally an adult, but absolutely gonna make this cake. I made it for my friend Jackie Woodson’s birthday, and she still talks about it.”
Plus, there’s her social media feed. Five recent gems:
“The number of times I wish my dog had a cellphone so I can text him something is…. a lot.”
“New niece just dropped.”
“Michelle Obama just casually showing up and reminding us that she is still one of the single best speakers in the country.”
“This commercial for a Hallmark movie began ‘a family bed and breakfast under water.’ Say less! I am locked in!”
“I am so tired of people telling me I am intimidating. I am not. I have stuffed animals. I make up songs about my dog. I decorate cakes. I am super quiet. You just see a tall, large Black woman and get scared. Deal with that.”
So! Without further ado, here Roxane shares 11 great things, including three book recommendations and the one thing she always brings on a plane…
Manifesto: My wife, Debbie, and I collaborated on a manifesto about love. I thought a lot about what actually makes our relationship work. What fuels the engine of our life together? Our 10 rules include ‘Delight in your partner’ and ‘When you argue, fight fair.’ I learned with Debbie how to let myself be loved, and how to love well in return.
Daily ritual: In L.A., my morning ritual is getting coffee at Starbucks with our dog, Maximus Torretto Blueberry Millman Gay (five names for a nine-pound dog!). An interviewer once gave me a hard time about admitting I go to such a basic coffee shop. But yes, me and hundreds of millions of people around the world! Also, they give Max a pup cup, and he loves it.
Recipe: My go-to dish is Melissa Clark’s chicken Milanese. The recipe suggests serving it with a tomato and mozzarella salad, but I like to zhuzh that up by adding cucumbers, soft herbs, fresh croutons, and my own vinaigrette.
Entertaining: We always serve wine from Brown Estate. It’s a Black-owned winery in Napa, and they make my favorite wines. I’m not a big drinker, but they have a fun red called Chaos Theory that is really worth a whirl.
Travel destination: It was my lifelong dream to visit Paris, and I went with Debbie for the first time several years ago. It absolutely met all of my expectations — and it’s not like we did anything earth shattering! We saw a lot of incredible art, and the café culture is lovely, no one is ever rushing you. It is just so delightful.
